Two and a Half Men
Comedy • Series

Two and a Half Men

"Two adults. One kid. No grown-ups."

7.4/10 2003 12 Seasons 262 Episodes Ended

A hedonistic jingle writer's free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.

Season: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12

Season 9 Episodes

S9E1
E1
Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt
21 min 2011

Alan and Jake meet Walden Schmidt, a broken-hearted billionaire.

S9E2
E2
People Who Love Peepholes
21 min 2011

Walden deals with his ex-wife, Bridget.

S9E3
E3
Big Girls Don't Throw Food
20 min 2011

Alan prepares Walden for a date with Bridget, while Jake decides to emulate Walden and drop out of school.

S9E4
E4
Nine Magic Fingers
21 min 2011

Walden goes looking for Mrs. Right while Alan has an opportunity to reconcile with Lyndsey.

S9E5
E5
A Giant Cat Holding a Churro
20 min 2011

Alan has trouble accepting Lyndsey's seedy movie past, and Walden tries to cheer him up by throwing a party.

S9E6
E6
The Squat and Hover
21 min 2011

Walden receives divorce papers from Bridget, but forgets his depression when he meets a girl who looks eerily like her.

S9E7
E7
Those Fancy Japanese Toilets
19 min 2011

Jake has a crush on his chemistry tutor, who has a crush on Walden. Meanwhile, Alan obsesses over the journal his brothe…

S9E8
E8
Thank You for the Intercourse
21 min 2011

When Walden begins redecorating the beach house, Alan becomes overly emotional.

S9E9
E9
Frodo's Headshots
21 min 2011

Upon his release from the hospital, Alan is met with a slew of challenges that test his ability to cope.

S9E10
E10
A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes
21 min 2011

Walden hits it off with a British babe, but neither of them is sure he's ready to re-enter the dating world.

S9E11
E11
What a Lovely Landing Strip
20 min 2011

Walden is trying his best to impress his new love interest when Bridget reappears in his life.

S9E12
E12
One False Move, Zimbabwe!
21 min 2011

Walden's mother arrives and Alan is smitten with her, even as she reveals a secret about Walden's past that sends him in…

S9E13
E13
Slowly and in a Circular Fashion
20 min 2012

Walden’s ex-wife and mother try to take control of his company, so he turns to Alan for help.

S9E14
E14
A Possum on Chemo
20 min 2012

Zoey tries to convince Walden to cut his hair and shave; Alan and Lyndsey revive their relationship.

S9E15
E15
The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack
21 min 2012

Walden tries to loosen Zooey up by sharing some of Berta's special brownies.

S9E16
E16
Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy
20 min 2012

Strained relationships and girl-fighting result when a huge storm traps Walden, Alan, Zoey and Lyndsey in the house on V…

S9E17
E17
Not in My Mouth!
19 min 2012

Walden and Zoey's relationship suffers after they share a near-death experience. Meanwhile, Alan wonders if Lyndsey has …

S9E18
E18
The War Against Gingivitis
21 min 2012

Walden's ex-business partner shows up at the beach house looking to make peace.

S9E19
E19
Palmdale, Ech
21 min 2012

Alan and Lyndsey introduce their mothers. Jake and Eldridge get a ride from Walden to a party.

S9E20
E20
Grandma's Pie
21 min 2012

Walden breaks the news to Zoey that he is going into business with his ex-wife. Alan and Lyndsey try to cope with their …

S9E21
E21
Mr. Hose Says "Yes"
21 min 2012

Walden's commitment is tested when Zoey and her daughter come to live with him. Meanwhile, Alan gets more than he bargai…

S9E22
E22
Why We Gave Up Women
21 min 2012

Charlie's ghost pays a visit to Alan after he suffers a minor heart attack.

S9E23
E23
The Straw in My Donut Hole
21 min 2012

Alan is showered with love and affection upon returning from the hospital, but Zoey isn’t so sure it’s deserved.

S9E24
E24
Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!
21 min 2012

Jake is pressured to make a decision about his future.

Cast

Ashton Kutcher
Ashton Kutcher
Walden Schmidt
Jon Cryer
Jon Cryer
Alan Harper
Conchata Ferrell
Conchata Ferrell
Berta

Trailer

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